In the ongoing effort to provide some “lighter side” thoughts, here are a few, courtesy of the Borowitz Report:
- Queen Elizabeth offers to re-annex the United States.
- Ivanka Trump applies to become Joe Biden’s daughter.
- Obama proposes canceling cable at the White House to get Trump to leave.
- Dr. Fauci says alcohol may be an aid during coronavirus briefings.
- Scientists say that Earth is endangered by a new strain of fact-resistant humans.
- Putin warns that the United States could wind up controlled by Americans.
- Kim Kardashian wonders if big-bottomed girls (with 4 kids and 3 marriages) will be in demand in 2022.
- Lou Dobbs applies for job at Four Seasons Landscaping.
- Canada declares Proud Boys to be domestic terrorists, just as Trump was preparing to give Medal of Freedom to former General Michael Flynn for his service to the group.
- Army Hammer announces he and latest girlfriend have become vegans.