While I was in New York City attending International Thriller Writers convention, a New York paper had a story on a public school that put out a list of recommended reading for summer. Unfortunately, the secretary was not very proficient, and apparently had never heard of the titles she was typing up. This led to some merriment, when titles like “The Great Gypsy” showed up.

In thinking about this article, the following list represents what a truly incompetent secretary might have recommended as literature to be read over the summer:
1) Madame Ovary
2) The Lovely Bone
3) The Great Gypsy
4) David Copafeel
5) For Whom the Bed Tolls
6) Harry Potted
7) The Fart Is A Lonely Hunter
8) Warren Pease
9) Stand Under Me
10) Our Mutual Fiend
11) The Turd Man
12) The Big Sleet
13) Winderella
14) A Tale of Two Titties
15) Beauty and the Breast
16) Jason and the Golden Fleas
17) Peter Pain
18) The Brothers Caramello
19) Bride and Prejudice
20) War and Peas
21) Lady Loverly’s Chatter
22) Children of a Lesser Cod
23) Keen Leer
24) Crimea and Punishment
25) The Marcia Chronicles
26) Prude and Prejudice
27) Skeleton Key